New Year, Smoo Year

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January 19, 2026

New Year, Smoo Year

A reality check for the new year…but don’t worry, this is actually a good one!

I’m not here to tell you HAPPY NEW YEAR!  Because I know there’s a good chance that many of us are already disenfranchised with the new year.  Already burned out, beating ourselves up about botched would-be new year resolutions. 

Listen, if you don’t do another thing, at least do this >>> GIVE YOURSELF GRACE. 

You didn't even give yourself a chance to rest from the Christmas craze, all the holiday hubbub, what essentially boils down to gross over performance. It feels kinda like planning a wedding while you’re at your kid’s baseball game simultaneously grocery shopping online…every day for 30 days until the gifts are opened…and then the honeymoon is over in less than 48 hours.  Definition of insanity?  Perhaps.

Even animals know this is the time of year for rest.  The days are shorter, it’s cold, it’s time to get cozy.  It’s time to snuggle, time to sleep.  So, use this time, the best you can, to rest, relax, and recalibrate.  And I’m right there with you, I’m not a winter person either but this time can be a gift. We need the rest and we can use this time to reflect.  We can choose to make the best of it.

SO, if you’re anything like me, I have a tendency to give everybody else grace, I just don’t give myself any.  So how do we give ourselves grace, especially as it relates to the new year?

Especially when, the truth is, we’re all just completely exhausted?

STEP 1:  REVIEW THE PAST YEAR…THROUGH A POSITIVE LENS. 

Now surely I’ve already demonstrated that I’m a realist so don’t let me lose you here.  Truth be told I’m an optimistic realist.  Even I don’t know how that works, but it does! 

SO, when you review last year try to pay attention to the things that stood our for you. 

What did you learn?  What did you discover?  What really worked…what really, really didn’t?  Celebrate your wins, even the smallest ones. They matter.

I mean, did YOU get YOUR closet cleaned out?! Because I didn't!

BUT (there’s always a big but and it’s usually mine) we also need to be realistic. 

Because we know life isn’t all rainbows and unicorn farts. (And aren’t we glad!?)

So…

STEP 2.  PROCESS…even mourn.  I know you’re thinking- good feeling gone, BUT not only is it okay to mourn what you lost, what you didn't do, didn't get accomplished, what you hoped for last year- I’m here to say YOU SHOULD.  Process your losses, your missteps or the things that simply slipped through your fingers because time is moving like its beep is on fire. For real.

Keep in mind I’m saying PROCESS.  When I was writing this, I thought, “Right, don’t wallow in it!”  And SQUIRREL!  I thought about my Mom telling me that my great grandmother, Grannan, used to call leftovers -wallows.  I thought hmmm- where did this come from and is it connected?

 Wallow:  to roll around in something loose, mixed, or uncontained, anything not neatly arranged

OK- got it, that’s how I’ve always used it.

THEN I look up the whole calling leftovers wallows- like is this a real deal or just a slang use for the word?  Sure enough, it’s the real deal.

Wallows:  in many older households, especially in pre-refrigeration or Depression-era families, leftovers were often combined, reheated, or repurposed

Grannan was born in 1904, so she very much falls in line with this era. 

Similar examples given were, “the slop bucket,” “the scraps,” “odds and ends,”  “the mess.”

So, wow, thank you Grannan (and Mom!) for reminding us not to sit in the leftovers,   the mess, the slop bucket of last year.

All this to say- when you process what you lost, what you didn’t get, what you didn’t DO, first, give yourself grace.  You’re doing A LOT, A LOT,  A LOT already…as a matter of fact we are all operating on some level of a trauma response and in survival mode.

(LOTS more on this to come!)

Honor what worked. And process what didn’t.  But don’t wallow in the wallows…

just get it out, talk about it, speak it, say it out loud… to yourself in the mirror, write it down, dictate it, tell your BFF, tell your cat (done it!) just release it! 

Exhale. 

Because I truly think we underestimate the value of simply processing. 

And as my Grandad always used to say, “Now there’s some sense to that.”

Until next time, wishing you much love and laughter.